Cruise Bound Poet--- also see below Tim McHargue's Book review of Portuguese novelist, Nobel Prize-winner Jose Saramago,“All the Names,” (1922-2010).

Cruise Bound Poet

June, 23 2013

            The worst part of a cruise is the check- in. Everyone told me this and it is true.  You will have a headache after airport security. I suggest using the cruise bus shuttle to get from the airport to the cruise ship, though a bit pricey it is worth the extra money and you will be in a better mood for the next round of cruise ship lines and security before embarking. 

An Alaskan Memory in Water color

            Gosh, I’m on a cruise. When did I become my mother? And when did I join the ranks of the bourgeoisie (even if only in comfort levels)? The truth is I’m just an aging Baby Boomer on the precipice of senior hood (well technically I’ve slid over the precipice or at least that’s how I feel some days). I just want a little pleasure without a lot of fuss.

            I’ve paid my dues (and yes this is directed to those who seem to be more plentiful nowadays than spam) who refer to hard work and deductions from pay checks (mine still, though retired after 45 plus years) as”entitlements.”

             Let me share the joys of  living in a rural community where the only summer jobs  were picking peaches, keeping track of bins of peaches, and sorting tomatoes ( along with the occasional gopher snakes) on tomato harvesters? Moving at eighteen to upstate New York I never graduated to the cannery line and a better paid union job. In Buffalo, I often caught two buses; first to a variety of nonunion jobs including factory work, bookkeeping, and sales clerking. After work, I caught a bus to night classes at S.U.N.Y. Buffalo. I also, taught art in a variety of venues including college. Then there was the white collar factories where for thirty years I proof read law, solved computer issues, and created virtually for the California State government. The latter work was performed in a windowless, hermetically controlled office that maintained a temperature just above freezing. This insured the computers didn’t crash but the employees turned into slushies.

            My first loves-the making of art, poetry, and writing got squeezed in between everything else. Okay I digress (a lot) to assuage any guilt about taking a cruise.

            We leave Sacramento at 8:25a.m. at which point I close my eyes and visualize an angel with golden wings guiding our plane into the air. This ritual is repeated before landing (that and gripping the chair handles until my knuckles turn white).

            By 12:30 p.m. and four hours later, I use my princess “key” to open the door to our cruise ship stateroom. My husband brings in our luggage (which sits as promised outside of our room door). We sit in comfortable patio chairs on our balcony with cups of teas in hand (some might prefer a good chardonnay or merlot but that comes later).Seattle’s Space Needle recedes in the distance until it is the size of a sewing needle that hidden in the cloth of blue sky. That is when the word heavenly comes to mind.

            The room is comfortable, though not large. I am soooo glad we opted for a balcony. We get a terrific view, needed infusion of light and all fears of developing claustrophobia are put to rest. We have a small refrigerator and a queen size bed. The dimmer reading lights on each side of the bed are really helpful for varied sleep patterns. Boy they think of almost everything.

             I’m glad I brought my little tea kettle to boil water because even the gourmet coffee tastes like a boiled miner’s boot. We also brought our favorite teas (the cruise ship has a good selection but not the ones we prefer). For those who don’t pack tea there is an afternoon tea at 3 p.m. each day resplendent with watercress sandwiches and Lady Fingers and such. This might be a good time to tell you that each passenger can bring two bottles of wine and two large bottles of water on board (my stylist brought vodka in her toiletry shampoo bottles but, that’s as Rick Steves says another story).

            You can order room service for tea, coffee, and ice and lots of other stuff as many times as you desire at no extra charge sort of. I say sort of because each passenger pays eleven dollars a day in gratuities (you don’t need to tip, I did a little anyway never one to forget my roots).  Still this was a nice bit of pampering I didn’t expect. Mike and I had the delivery folks burning rubber off the soles of their shoes numerous 24/7. So, this is how the rich and famous live? We took advantage of this especially for breakfasts and emergency late night hot chocolates.

            The cruise ship is glitzy a la Las Vegas-basically a floating ship of sin and indulgence. There is a casino (the only thing I got from the casino was a chain for my Princess Cruise ID/charge card). It is very important to keep track of this because all purchases on ship are made using the card, opens your room door and provides admittance back on the ship at ports of call.  I am uncool and wear it a like coveted necklace.  

            Other good stuff includes unlimited 24/7 food, swimming pools, hot tubs, a gym, (you definitely need to use the treadmill daily if you plan on wearing any of your pants home). Oh, that’s right you can always buy a larger size at the ship’s clothing boutique.

            If a clothes shopping isn’t your thing there is also, jewelry shopping, a spa with massage, manicures, and pedicures, and wrinkle removing facials. But wait there is more including teeth whitening, wine tasting, art auctions with free champagne (and art sort of). Then there are the classes: Zumba, line dancing, magic tricks (no kidding) and even journaling. For those who still read without a virtual book there is the honor library. There is also a self-launderette so; you can bring fewer clothes. I’ll do this next time.

One of my water colors of a fleeting Alaskan Moment

            The ship’s resident naturalist gives informative daily lectures and has books for sale about Alaska. When there was a particularly beautiful natural wonder (that we should all be snapping pictures of, videotaping, and drooling over (or like us, doing all three) her voice was piped through the ship’s intercom system (outside and in the lobbies). This happened at 6 a.m. as the Golden Princess cruised the Tracy Arm Fjord to view the Sawyer Glacier (in the Tongass National Forest). The ship was turned a 180 degrees so; everyone on the port and starboard side got to see the glacier.  This was very nice of the Captain, who I learned was an Italian. Yes, both the turn and the glacier were spectacular. Later I read that this fjord often has icebergs as large as three story buildings floating in its emerald green waters. Glad we didn't run into any.

 Sawyer Glacier

            If nothing I've already listed above interests you there is also food, drink, and entertainment. The entertainment was first rate and includes music, dance, comedians, and magic shows the latter complete with the lady in a sparkly dress getting sawed in half.

             There are numerous bars and clubs positioned on each floor with clear well placed signs everywhere telling you how to find your way back to your room. You will get lost a few times anyway, not to worry as everyone is polite and helpful to Baby Boomer types who slur their words and wobble having not quite found their sea legs.

Dining With White Table Cloths

   We opted for open dining so, besides dining at the times we choose, dine with a variety of people. These included a fourteen year old student from Charlotte, a college student that raised rabbits for magic shows, Texas ranchers, a tug boat Captain, (who told really funny corny jokes), a wild fire fighter, a couple, who lived 5 miles from the last EF5 Tornado that struck near Tulsa (they were considering putting in a storm shelter) and others of note.

    Golden Princess on right 

             The food was really good quality and there were several wait people on hand to serve you.  My favorite, a rarity at the home dinner table, was the lobster and jumbo shrimp that the wait person deftly
shelled. The presentation was always first rate: tables covered with starched white broad cloths, napkins to match and silverware with different sized spoons and forks (so many choices you need to consult Martha Stewart). One bit of advice: leave your religious and political beliefs at home. It makes for better dinner conversation and less food throwing.  I will post more on my blog at some point: http://jennifersword.blogspot.com/